I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Randomize
