Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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