so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
