I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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