Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
