So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
