You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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