i just wanna soil my oats bro
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
