You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Jerry, you need to find god
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
