Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
