belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I had to cum in my sink.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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