lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
