We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize