have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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