I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize