Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
