really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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