I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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