you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
