u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
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