nut hugger
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
