if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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