she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
