Already got asked if we're dating
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize