goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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