just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
