I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
