we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
