love makes seman taste better
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize