I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
