Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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