did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
It's official drugs can't kill me
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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