Non-Jews are for practice
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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