Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I think people are normalizing furries
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
