Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
