Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
