Quick, to the slutcave!
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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