I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize