Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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