you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
my liver is dry heaving
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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