You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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