while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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