so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
