Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
