just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
