I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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