i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
