he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Randomize
