I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
