what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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