Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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