come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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