With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
